Pass N' Play Frustrations

[zer0CD]

I'm fairly new to these boards (look @ my join date), and all I've seen for the past month is a bunch of QQ threads complaining about some aspect of the game. Usually these complaints only pertain to the 1v1 League metagame where people can't get over how broken a giant pink whale is or that boring camper and his OP bombshells. Or sometimes they're actually legitimate complaints like how weak brambles are. Recently, however, people have started to complain about the lesser known parts of the game like 2v2.

Look I got nothing against 2v2, but we all know 1v1 is where the real men are at, mano a mano. Because let's be real, if you still need your best friend to help you win games, then you're still a hairless, potentially intelligent, monkey. Now the travesty of this whole situation is that the manliest game mode for outwitters, Pass n' Play (basically playing yourself), has gone largely ignored by everybody. Well I'm here to give Pass n' Play the attention it deserves, because right now the game mode is completely broken.

As the only player, and thus only Super Titan, in my pass n' play league, I have discovered something more broken than pre-patch FTA, FFA (The Fast Finger Advantage). FFA - if you double tap "Done" very quickly at the end of your turn, then the game skips your opponent's turn and it is your turn again. As a result, the 1v1 metagame is completely broken, and the only chance p2 has of winning is if p1 messes up FFA somehow and allows p2 to FFA him to victory. As indisputable proof that FFA is completely broken, with this technique, I have achieved a perfect 1:1 W/L ratio (because for some reason, when I win, I also lose). 5 seconds of testing has confirmed that double tapping also breaks the 2v2 pass n' play metagame, but it should be more aptly called quadra-tapping and has a much lower success rate than double tapping. So while all of you are out there wondering if you could get dinosaurs into outwitters, know that somewhere out there, real men, with no friends, are suffering daily from the atrocity known as FFA aka double tapping. Fixing this should priority 1 on Adam's small list of changes he'll actually make.

Disclaimer: Double tapping only confirmed on iPhone 4, unknown how responsive other devices are to rapid tapping. If you don't know a joke thread when you see one, then I am secretly garcia1000's alt account, and my time was not important enough to not post this trash.

Edit: Amoffett has confirmed that double tapping works on the iPad. The need for a hot fix has become even greater.
Edit2: It has been brought to my attention that some people may be interested in joining my Pass n' Play league, iBRO, all interested parties please click this link
Edit3: Since posting this message of truth, I have received a flurry of emails from anonymous manly men who are forced to double tap constantly due to the state of the metagame. As a result, most suffer from carpal tunnel syndrome. Excessive jerking off may play a part, but now we know that double tapping has serious medical implications. Comrades we must urge Adam into action!!!
Edit4: I AM NOT GARCIA BUT I AM A FARMER. FFA please double click
Edit5!!! I REALLY AM GARCIA!!! NOT REALLY